If You Ever Come Back
by needsmoreicing
Summary: Life after Ella proves to be more than Nate thought it could be and he wonders that maybe if he'd done thing differently she would have come back. [Sequel to Lies]


A/N: So! This is the sequel to "Lies" and I REALLY recommend reading that one shot before you continue with this one! I'd also like to apologize for my disappearance in the last few months and say that I'm back!

Hello to all my new readers and salutations to all my old! Lets get back into the swing of things!

* * *

If you're standing with your suitcase  
But you can't step on the train  
Everything's the way that you left it I still haven't slept yet

And if you're covering your face now  
But you just can't hide the pain  
Still setting two plates on the counter but eating without 'cha

* * *

Staring at the second plate on the counter, Nate continued to push the food on his plate around. He didn't bother eating any of the food that was long past cold, just gazing at the spot where Ella used to be. Hallways sounded empty with just one pair of feet, without the click of her heels or the sound of her laughter. Nate closed his eyes and took in a breath, pretending that he could still smell her perfume even though it was gone and stale now. He opened his eyes and just simply looked at the food on his plate, the gouging ache in his chest was too painful to look back at her place across from him.

With a sigh, he picked up the black stone flatware that were filled with her favorite Chinese food and tossed it into the trash. Moo Goo Gai Pan had never been something he bothered to try until he'd been with Ella, he had his pick so why did he need to change? As his throat tightened, Nate wished that he could be different, but it just wasn't his way. He didn't like change and Ella had always pushed that limit from the very first kiss. The fit of her body against him when he pressed her against her kitchen counter, not too unlike his own. Nate heard the crack of a plate as he stormed away from the kitchen and, for once, didn't care if it was broken or chipped, didn't bother to clean it up, and didn't bother to hold his emotions back as his hands slammed down on the piano in his living room.

It was all anger, hurt, and betrayal flying from his finger tips. How could she leave him? Didn't she know that his entire world revolved around her? His hands stilled and he rested his head on the music stand. No, no she hadn't and that was his fault. Nate didn't pretend to not know why she left, he didn't act like he was a victim because he'd hurt the one person who meant the most to him. He wasn't stupid and knew exactly why she left, but he couldn't understand _how_.

It felt like he'd been taken into a back alley and kicked until all of his bones were broken when he realized that Ella wasn't coming back. Lifting his head, he could clearly see her sitting on the little leather wing back chair, twirling a piece of hair around her finger and smiling, just like she'd done countless times. Sometimes she'd go to open her mouth to say something, and her lips would move but nothing would come out. That's what killed him the most, when he'd realized that it was just a dream. So he watched the fake Ella silently talk and laugh, giving him the look he craved from her, the one that made him know that she adored him.

But walking up his stairs into his bedroom, Nate knew that his mental rendering would never be as wonderful as the real thing. Changing in to a ratted old tee shirt and sweats he trudged over to his night stand and took out his contacts and turned his lights off. He'd started using Ella's pillow as his own because it almost felt like her head would be on his chest again, if only he didn't feel so lonely in his bed. Taking a deep breath, a pang hit him again in realizing that the scent of her shampoo was almost gone.

Gone.

That's what she was. Ella was gone.

He hardly even blinked as hours faded and the sun rose in his window, because all of his light was gone.

* * *

If the truth is you're a liar  
When you say that you're okay  
I'm sleepin on your side of the bed goin' out of my head now

And if you're out there try'na move on  
But somethin' pulls you back again  
I'm sitting here try to persuade you like your in the same room

* * *

Caitlyn stared at the magazine stand in a daze, wanting to throw up or shout for joy, she wasn't sure which one she would do first. Because there, on the glossy front page, was Ella. Happy, laughing, and real Ella. Her hands were shaking and tears brimmed as the cashier at the grocery store cleared his throat and asked if she wanted to pay for the magazine. So She did, and sat in her car holding the tabloid to her chest taking deep breaths. Caitlyn pulled the magazine away from her quickly, almost as if her shirt would rub Ella's picture off of the cover.  
Ella looked so happy holding the hand of some young new actor. So happy that Caitlyn was sure she hadn't seen a smile from Ella that bright in a year and half. Caitlyn knew that her fiance and friends wouldn't see the magazine, not that they cared to look at them, but what if they did? Would they see the same happiness that Caitlyn was? She felt guilty, like she should protect Ella and not tell her friends about what she'd seen at the store, even if she had no idea why she was protecting Ella in the first place.

It's not that she was an expert in people, because God knows that Caitlyn Gellar had the foulest mouth to go with her temper, but she did consider herself a specialist on the oddities of her friends. So if Ella needed a change of scene, Caitlyn knew it had to be for a good reason. Ella just didn't leave somewhere on a whim, she liked having roots and a place to come back too or some type of history there. It was backlash from traveling across the country as a kid and having to give up her friends to continue to live with her father's rockstar lifestyle.

Caitlyn had to have faith in her friend, trusting her that this really was the best decision and Caitlyn could do that if it meant Ella could look this happy. She tore the picture of Ella beaming at her friend at a little cafe and stored it in her dashboard. It seemed crazy, but if she ever doubted that Ella was out there and could be happy _there_ and not _here_, she could look at that picture and have proof. Solid evidence that Ella was alive and doing well. With that in mind, Caitlyn nodded her head firmly and touched up her running mascara. And out of the corner of her eye, Caitlyn saw something that made her heart skip a beat. There at the entry of the grocery store she'd _just_ left, was Ella smiling sadly at her. Caitlyn blinked once and stared in shock as Ella gave a flimsy wave to her. Caitlyn didn't really believe in signs, but knew this was about as close as she'd get to having one. She went to leap out of her car, shaking a fist a swearing at a man when he zoomed by her too quickly, looked back at then entrance and stopped.

Ella had disappeared.

The clinch in her gut was unsettling and unnervingly absent, almost as if Caitlyn knew that this wouldn't be the last time she saw her friend. But her upper lip quivered and she raced back to her car to take a deep calming breath. She'd shed enough tears for a life time over this, it was time to move on if not for her own sake then for Ella's. Caitlyn knew that one day Ella would be back, her famous gut had never been wrong before and she refused to believe it now, but Ella needed her space . If that's what she wanted than that's what Ella was going to get.

* * *

And I wish you could give me the cold shoulder  
And I wish you could still give me a hard time  
And I wish I could still wish it was over  
But even if wishing is a waste of time  
Even if I never cross your mind

* * *

The new stylist had asked Nate to do something with his hair if he wasn't going to style it anymore. So buzz cut it was, and the Ella that sat perched on the corner of his desk was not pleased. Her lips were drawn into a thin line and her arms were crossed over her chest as she faced away from him, giving him a cold shoulder to end all cold shoulders. Her eyes darted over him and her posture relaxed a little, a clear sign that he'd be forgiven. Nate even grinned a little as her hand came over to run over where thick curls used to be. But his stomach dropped as he felt nothing, because she still wasn't here.

"You know, this would be easier if you just came back." Nate muttered while staring at a sheet of unfinished music. There was no reply, not that he expected one anymore, Nate continued to just look over what he'd already written. Music just didn't come together like it used too, it' didn't have the same appeal to him anymore.

Nate didn't feel music, he didn't taste food, and he could hardly remember the last time he slept without seeing Ella's face. People were starting to become worried, had they worried over Ella?

He grimaced; No, people didn't know that there was something to worry about.

It was his fault and he knew it, but no one else seemed too. Well, except for Brown.

Nate's brown furrowed deeper at the thought of his uncle. Brown knew there was something going on between the two of them the entire time, but hadn't said a word. Nate realized now that maybe that was the problem.

Maybe he should have shown her off or taken her dancing even if he hated it, let her keep a few things in his closet because Nate knew that his wardrobe didn't even take up half. He should have screamed it from the mountain tops, he should have done this and he should have done that, but it was all too late now.

Looking at the false image of her with his reddened eyes, Nate knew that it was much too late for them now.

* * *

I'll leave the door on the latch  
If you ever come back if you ever come back  
There'll be a light in the hall and a key under the mat  
If you ever come back  
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on  
And it will be just like you were never gone  
There'll be a light in the hall and a key under the mat  
If you ever come back if you ever come back now  
Oh if you ever come back if you ever come back now

Now they say I'm wasting my time  
'Cause you're never comin home  
But they used to say the world was flat but how wrong was that now

* * *

The key to her apartment still fit, and for a moment he thanked God above as he opened the door. It remained almost unchanged as the last time he'd left and from what he could remember. Shoes littered the hallway, her bathroom light was still left on, and it even smell like honey and herbal tea. He saw her round the corner, baseball bat high in the air, and his breathing stopped. He couldn't move, couldn't hear the bat hit the ground as her mouth fell open in shock and her eyes welled up with tears. His heart broke as her eyes brimmed and spilled over, but started to piece back together as she rushed into his arms.

He could still feel that same warmth she used to give him, burning in his heart, and he wondered why he'd ever walked away when she told him too. Try as he might, he couldn't remember what was said or who slammed the doors anymore. All he could think about was giving her one more chance and giving _them_ one last try. He kissed the top of her curly brown hair and closed his eyes.

"Chevy, why?" Peggy asked in a whisper, as if she was afraid of his answer. She'd been the one who put them on the back burner for her career. Pushed him away when she needed him and ignored him at the price of him leaving. Peggy hadn't planned on falling in love with her best friend's brother and seeing him again only solidified in her mind that she should have never let him go.

"Ella." Chevy answered holding her tightly. Watching Ella fall apart reminded him of how angry he'd been when he left. How he'd try and pick fights with strangers out at the bar and how numb he'd been. Because Ella wasn't angry, she was just sad. Sad that Nate could never love her as much as she loved him. Chevy had never wondered if Peggy loved him, only if he'd ever come close to being as important as her career. But now that didn't matter, because he had her back in his arms again.

Peggy nodded mutely, listening to Chevy's racing heart beat. Peggy told him about how she'd pick up the phone to call him but always chickened out at the last minute; he told her the same. She cried for their lost time and thanked the stars above that he'd come back when so many other's said that he wouldn't. She wept for her best friend, asking if Ella would come back only to be met with a tight squeeze and a kiss on the head.

Peggy already knew her answer.

* * *

And by leavin' my door open  
I'm risking everythin' I own  
There's nothin' I can lose in a break-in that you haven't taken

If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss  
I know you're out there somewhere so just remember this  
If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss  
Oh just remember this, oh just remember this

* * *

A plate is a plate, is a plate. Shane would have laughed at how hard this was for him and Mitchie would try and help but only end up being frustrated by Nate's lack of commitment in having a say in his new flatware. If they were speaking to him, that is. Shane was at his wits end at Nate's lack of effort to find Ella and Mitchie was just trying to keep things together. But why did Nate need to find Ella when he had one right here?

Running a hand over his smooth hair, Nate could hear the clicking of cameras outside the store windows and he did his best to ignore them, choosing to let his eyes follow the little image of Ella flitting from one brightly colored stoneware to a high glossed glass set. Her face was in obvious joy as she 'd examine each object and then frown at the price, obviously being much to high for what she thought it should be. The image turned to him with a shrug and a smile as she sauntered down the isle. From the corner of his eye, he saw the photographers leave, obviously being bored with his mundane task. If only they could see what he saw.

Ella was over with the dinner ware and was holding a fork, mimicking brushing it through her long hair and mouthing what Nate was sure to be The Little Mermaid lyrics. Behind him, a loud crash was heard as a worker dropped a display plate before dashing off with a loud stream of curses. Nate looked back to the flat ware, only to find his image was gone. He rubbed his eyes before glancing at his watch. How long had it been since he'd slept?

Picking up a dish set, he made his way to the check out as his mind sluggishly tried to preform the math. Too long, he'd decided, it had been far to long since he'd actually slept. Mechanically he handed the cashier his card, smiled when she gushed and asked for his autograph, and he thanked her as he left the store. The street was overly crowded, in typical LA style, when Ella made a reappearance. She smiled sadly, almost as if she'd been lost while he'd had his mind distracted by other things, then she glided towards him in that effortless way that only Ella could. Nate had stayed rooted in his spot, even though he knew she'd follow him even if he'd already made it to his car and driven away.

He gave a sad smile as she reached him, her mouth opening and he braced himself for the silence that always came. But he was wrong.

"Hey Nate."

* * *

And it will be just like you were never gone  
And it will be just like you were never gone  
And it will be just like you were never gone  
If you ever come back if you ever come back now


End file.
